Bruno Mars at it again

I’m back on the Bruno Mars beat!  I like Bruno.  I think he’s a great singer, up there with Sam Cooke or Stevie Wonder.  But his songs are unsatisfying.  Now that you’ve heard my band you can discount my opinions as those of a hack, but I’m going to put my opinions out there.  I like my lyrics.  I’ll put them next to anyone’s.  But enough about me.

I like the melody of this song.  I like Bruno’s vocal performance, it’s brilliant.

But as usual, the lyrics are dumb.  So dumb.

My wife and I were listening to this and she asked me “who could relate to this?”

No one.

That’s not true.  Bruno’s song is sung from the perspective of a man who has been dumped and his girlfriend has moved on.  Fine so far.

Here’s the meat of what he got dumped for:

My pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways

Here’s how he illustrates this:

I should have bought you flowers

And held your hand

Shoulda gave you all my hours

When I had the chance

Take you to every party cause all you wanted to do was dance

Uh huh.

I wish there were a word for it, but Bruno is engaged in the time-honored act of saving face by conceding that he screwed up but then finding examples that aren’t really all that embarrassing.  That is relatable.  If Bruno wrote a song that was consciously playing on that idea, that would be pretty clever.  I don’t see that happening here.

Does anyone get dumped for not buying flowers?  Not in the real world.  Men get dumped for things like cheating, acting like a slob, ignoring their girlfriend in order to hang with friends (he makes a nod towards this), being clingy, being pushy, being controlling, etc.  The list is long.  It has never included not holding hands.

We listen to music because it helps us understand the world or understand our own feelings.  Bruno is letting us down.  I love the way the guy sings, but someone’s got to tell him his lyrics aren’t cutting it.  Bruno needs to dig deeper.  Bruno knows why he got dumped.   Or he should.  He should write that song.

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