Things that suck about being in a band: That Sucks.

Or its less mature brother- that’s gay.

The words no one with an idea they brought to the band wants to hear.

Let me paint a picture for you.

The band is all together, practicing songs.  You get an idea.  During a pause between songs, you chime in with:

“You know, I was thinking at the end of this song, maybe we could do a round”

“A what?”

“You know, how like the voices overlap on row row row your boat, that sort of thing, I think it would be really cool”

“That’s gay”

PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSssss- the sound of the air going out of the room

“What do you mean? My Chemical Romance does one on that one song”

bravely trying to press on

“My Chemical Romance is gay”

nope, now you’re done

You decide that now is the time to pretend you have to go to the bathroom, and you sneak out to go run out onto the freeway.

Seriously, this is probably the suckiest thing about being in a band if you’re one of the ideas persons.  It’s fucking nerve wracking to me to bring in songs to the practice space.  Sometimes my songs suck.  I know that.  But I almost never know that until I’ve played them for some people.  Playing a new song live isn’t a big deal- you’ve got the band backing you up.  Playing it in front of people for the first time- that takes courage.

Not only is it galling to have your idea ruthlessly destroyed in front of people who are supposed to respect you, it’s almost always the least useful member of the band doing the destroying.  The bass player who only shows up half the time.  The guitar player who shoots down EVERY FUCKING COVER IDEA YOU’VE EVER HAD (and proposes covers so damn hard you suspect he just wants you to see you publicly immolate yourself).  It’s always the person who has never tried to write a song, has never made a significant positive contribution to the creation of a song who will be quickest to shit on your idea.

I get it, some of the people who play punk rock are damaged.  They’ve been misfits like me all their lives, and they’ve put a ton of work into their image and they don’t want someone in the audience to call them gay or say their band sucks.  But it’s not an excuse.

I have no more jokes about this, because this shit sucks.  And not just being calling people gay is not cool in 2013.

Just for the record, this isn’t about anyone in my band right now, and speaking of my band, have you heard our CD?

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